permission

do you know that you have permission? permission to be alive, to taste the world, to smile a big wide smile at the world. you are allowed to risk hurting yourself and others in your quest to feel alive, you are allowed to risk poverty through your generosity and injury through your recklessness. you can ruin your health and lose your shape through self abuse, you can lose your friends and step on lover's heads in your quest for ambition, because nobody will stop you, nobody is qualified to judge you, and nobody is really watching.
but now that you are free, just what do you want to be? if there is no judge but you, who do you want to be?
if there is no right and wrong, no god watching, no kharma to pay, just how would you want to live? if all your sins didn't lose you any sleep would you still have values that you believe are worth living up to? if nobody was impressed by your values would you still want them?
i am asking because so many people live on autopilot, following values which they have never truly considered, feeling guilt or fear of a god that they've never really believed in, or felt squashed by a conscience that they've never really thought about. are we good if we are good through fear? especially if we are not even certain what we are afraid of.
perhaps you have been seeking the approval of your friends or family, but have you considered how you would feel if they were no longer there to judge or approve?
if nobody was watching, would you still care?